Feeling like hell today…

Sometimes, it’s so hard to breathe. When you feel your chest getting heavy and you get this sudden over powering sense of depression and sadness. You become at a loss for words, your whole face crumples up and you want to cry but you can’t, because thousands of people are watching you. You long to get away but you can’t. You want to run away but you can’t. You turn to suicide or self hurt or thoughts of running away for comfort, but in the end ; does it really help, no it doesn’t. You then have the only hope that something terrible happens to you, an accident, or you die or you just stop living it’s alright then. That’s not the answer we all know..but it’s a temporary relief, it’s the only relief. The worse thing is that life is never ever really fair. You don’t get the recognition when you deserve it. After doing hours and months of duty, you feel like a dog still licking your master’s shoes in the hope of some grace. What really happens is the one who doesn’t do an ounce of work, but makes a lot of noise, is the one who gets the pat on the back and the due recognition of course. How much more unfair can life get ????!!!!!

Then you pray for a teeny weeny ray of light and hope that tomorrow doesn’t get any more worse !!!

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About ....the little thread of thoughts

through five yrs of med school, and now taking a 2 yr break before post-grad working in mission hosp in India; 'm one of ur norm' everyday ppl. Nothing dramatic goin' on in my life, but it's not so quiet either. Just "a lot of happenings". So, hi there n Have a great day :) View all posts by ....the little thread of thoughts

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