In the process of getting back…

Over the past week, there were couple of things I had learnt from introspection and the words of wisdom emailed over; but the most important thing was to find myself. Or simply put, to get back on track !!

Yes I am still waiting for the outcome, but meanwhile I’m really tired of waking up and dreading each day. So I figured that it was time to get creative and so started with…

“My experiments in the kitchen”… Now why should I miss a chance to have fun with chocolate !! Though so far my progress has been limited to just finishing off the cookie batter, I must say that my evening turned out to be pretty good yesterday. Minus my on-call days, I guess the kitchen is a good enough place to have some fun..

Next on the “to-do” list is to get back on track with my reading and writing. Not just the blogging bit but the entire set of novels and blogs, that I have not been reading for a while…. Or maybe play with the colours and paint my bedroom a riot of shades…. Or just laze around the day watching the good ol’ movies and mindless snacking ( and grow real huge, nah maybe I have to cross that one out !!)…Or just long walks and sit in solitude..though I have been doing that for the past one week…

To be honest, I haven’t really figured out a plan to find myself; but one thing that I do know is that I have to start soon…

Maybe what I really have to do is to resist the urge to feel like you’re the only one going through this.

As said in the “In Invisible Man”, Ralph Ellison summed this up well: All my life I had been looking for something, and everywhere I turned someone tried to tell me what it was. I accepted their answers too, though they were often in contradiction and even self-contradictory. I was naive. I was looking for myself and asking everyone except myself questions which I, and only I, could answer. It took me a long time and much painful boomeranging of my expectations to achieve a realization everyone else appears to have been born with: that I am nobody but myself.

And maybe it goes beyond finding some meaning in life; maybe it has something to do with making a meaning out of life…

And I hope that, I would soon find my way back on the road…


About ....the little thread of thoughts

through five yrs of med school, and now taking a 2 yr break before post-grad working in mission hosp in India; 'm one of ur norm' everyday ppl. Nothing dramatic goin' on in my life, but it's not so quiet either. Just "a lot of happenings". So, hi there n Have a great day :) View all posts by ....the little thread of thoughts

2 responses to “In the process of getting back…

  • Ivy Blaise

    Being creative with chocolate is a good start! Only we, as in ourselves, can create our own meaning in our lives…. and if that is chocolate then so be it! 🙂

    It is a journey down a winding road and even if it sometimes feels like we are doubling back on the way, it always leads somewhere. We create the journey and we chose where it leads, a little step at a time.


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