Tag Archives: introspective

What I have learnt by mid-spring….

Nearing the mid-spring days and looking back over the days ( more like weeks) passed, there are a couple of things that I have realized. And after last night’s contemplations, I have decided to pen them down….

No matter what happens or how bad today is, there is always a tomorrow to look forward to. Life just goes on. No matter how hard I try, I can’t slow down the tick-tock of the clock. The needle hands move, the sand falls down and so another try comes along.


Even though they say that  “life” and “living” are essentially the same, I beg to differ. It’s never the same. Somehow, life holds a more potent feel to it. I guess when you add the meaning or substance to living, that’s when I could call it life.

And of second chances, life is full of it. It’s just that they keep on hiding in the nooks and crannies, and that unless you are looking for them with an open mind and try to hope ; they won’t come out of the shadows. But if you hunt them down, you would find them.

And opportunities, when they knock it’s not only about opening the door but ushering it in and making something out of it. Placidity is an admirable trait but staying too placid, such that it equates with “stagnancy” is not life’s way. After every catcher’s mitt has a dual role; to catch at the curve or bend and then throw it back!!

And I have learnt that life always has its fair share of pains and gains. Though at some points, it feels like there is more of the pain than the fun. That’s when I realize that it’s not just me, but most of us. And the beauty of it is how we carry on, in spite of the tears and worries that we are holding within.

As far as making the tough decisions go, I have realized that making my fears and apprehensions a white board helps. And when I close my eyes, believing in hope, faith and an open mind; I am able to make the right call.

One of the most important things that I have learnt over the dawn of spring is that; we are not alone. We are a part of a bigger existence. Everyone has fears but what makes them numb, is the human connections. That’s what keeps the spirit going even through the troubled times.

Each time I reach out and lend a shoulder or a helping hand, a kind word or just a huge hug; it makes me feel happy. Happy that someone’s day has been brightened and unknowingly, my load feels light on seeing their smile. Words may be forgotten or even actions may be forgotten after a while; but the feelings experienced shall always remain. They make the special moments and memories. And they are what should be passed on. Making someone feel special is a gift that even time can’t erase.

 

And the final thought is that , I learnt that I can never stop learning. Till the music ends, new notes have to be grasped and translated into the vibes of life. After all, though life may not be the party that I had hoped for, the least I could do is to dance to the music and bring in the new steps.

And so here ends my train of words. Come Monday morning, it’s time for me to grab my sneakers and be on the run again. Here’s to a wonderful week to all of you.

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It’s the little things too….

Earlier this week, the ER was loaded with patients following a freak road accident. Who had caused it? It was a stray dog which had crossed the road, resulting in the swerving of a motorbike, which in turn led to the collision of two cars coming at across each other, which in turn led to the four wheel-drive coming from behind ….( minus the details) and the accident happened.

Thankfully no life was lost, but the injuries were plenty. Among the accident victims, there was a middle-aged gentleman, in his early fifties,  who had temporarily lost the use of both his legs (fracture in the right and major soft tissue injury in the left). In the course of conversation with him, “I’m not ready to go. I haven’t spent enough time with my family or even my close friends. It was all about making money and saving it for later. But I have still haven’t lived life. I don’t want to go…”

This is a common echo among most of us, I guess. Most of us, even me, are caught in the chaos of living the modern life, going about the practice, our individual business and projects, that many a time, we forego our private lives in due course of time.

Saving up life for later, …it’s understandable, but when does “later” come?

When does “that day” finally dawn?

When does the time that you really want to spend and savor on the most important things of life come?

While on the road, most of us don’t usually get a pre-warning sign saying that, hey it’s going to be time-up soon. It just happens so and then it’s too late.

Taking a break often, may not be feasible. But instead, each day, an hour can be spent only on family, or friends. Some time each day, to re-connect the ties, to get back on track. No, I don’t mean only logging onto Facebook or posting tweets. That is important, yet is it so difficult to call up or voice-chat and hear some one’s voice? If time zones vary, an email will also do.

Life is not only about big vacation plans or holidays to some exotic place. It’s about the little things. The time spent with the kids on the beach or the park, time spent on the family baking a cake, time spent on a long drive to the picnic spots, time spent at the family farm with grand-parents.

As Ashley Smith said, “Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble-bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.

Reaching the dreams and the stars is a must, but on the way-up taking the time to appreciate the little things and make little memories on the way.

No one really knows when time will run out….


Echoes of the Apple’s co-founder

Each one has been given a chance in life.

It’s up to us to make a decision to grab it.

To grab the chance and make it happen.

To think different.

To explore.

The will and courage to make a change.

To dream big and to make the dream true.

And most important of all is to not lose hope, even when pitfalls come on the way.

And that is what life says through its legendary people.

Here are some of my favorite lines of the legendary Steve Jobs, his views on life and his experiences as he travelled the road…

“Almost everything–all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure–these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.” – Steve Jobs’ Stanford Commencement Address

“Here’s to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes… the ones who see things differently — they’re not fond of rules… You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can’t do is ignore them because they change things… they push the human race forward, and while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, are the ones who do.” – Think Different, narrated by Steve Jobs

It’s all about finding your dream and making it come true.

Making a difference will come along.

Live your dream.

 

 

 

 

 


Ringing in my head….

Some songs have kind of stayed with me through the years i.e. from my high school days to today, the working woman. So as I head off to my rural area of work, all I can say is that “I’m here without you.”

Well, this is one of the songs that puts me in a nostalgic frame. Brings back memories, good ones I must say. Reminds me of my transition between high school to college. A new place. A different set of people. A totally new culture. And that was when this song was released. And it has stayed on since then.

What your favorite song that has stayed on through the high school years or college till now ?!


Count ’em what we take for granted…

Nothing jarring or out of the blue happened today. Just the morning headlines, “ Tremors felt in New Delhi”, “Four killed in a collision”, “Libyan unrest still Prevails”….a pretty depressing start to the day. And the evening just ended with a hit-and-run accident in the ER ( Emergency Room), unfortunately the patient never made it.

Which is what brings me to the realisation that life is indeed frail or rather temporary, pure uncertainity is the underlining ring to it. One minute, I might be here ? Next minute, I can’t gurantee that. That’s why they say, make the best of every second that you get. Make your bucket list, do the things that you have always wanted to.  But what about the people in your life ?! Relationships, they are precious and keeps me going through the tough times, makes memories that stay for a lifetime. But at times,I kind of dread that word. Why so ? Because,there are some relationships that have kind of fizzed out. To pin-point what lead to the rusting of these relationships, I don’t have a definite answer. Some of them became so, because I had my hands tied up with work and other interests,  and didn’t bother keeping it alive. Others were inevitable good-byes, change of place, change of work and as very often the
statement runs, “too busy to keep in touch”.  What hurts the most, are those relationships
which gate-crashed because time was never spent to sort out the mis-understandings. Those kind of relationships that Iwould hate to let go off, but I didn’t do the right thing then.That time then, I kind of shrugged it off saying maybe later.

But life, or as some call it fate or destiny intervenes or rather interferes. And before anyone knows it, it’ll be too late to mend the fences. Too late, because at the other end of the line, the person may no longer be there.

To put it down as a matter of fact, we all take relationships for granted, accepting the continued presence of the other person, and believing that no matter what happens, inspite of all the misunderstandings and lost connections; destiny will find a way out…

But sometimes, there is no way out, sometimes, destiny won’t bother with you, with me or with our emotions. It goes it’s own way…..

Sometimes that time is the last time…The last time that you would ever see the person, hear their voice, hold those interesting arguments and jokes that made your day…..Those are the relationships that end due to the inevitable play of fate. The feeling of regret and guilt eats your precious memories with that person and unless time steps in and tries to find a way to help you heal,  you end up being a lost cause – the days of guilt, regert and misery.

But what about the rest of the relationships, where at the other end of the line, the person is still there, waiting for you, somewhere ? Unsorted misunderstandings, forgotten promises, harsh words, power play and back-kniving for the sake of power and prestige. There’s no need to shrink or cringe on realization about the latter. We humans, are known to be quite selfish by nature, that under the temptation of power and fame, we succumb too easily and play our chances, uncaring to the further consequences in life. But that’s where conscience, sensibility and honor later come into play. We rectify those mistakes made and try to re-bridge the connections.

But, sometimes, or rather many a time, when you turn your back on someone, they’ll turn their back on you too….What will you do then ? Shrug your shoulders and find someone else? Maybe…

Maybe for a while it will work out. But that someone else won’t be the same person who shared those funny moments, gave you that sincere advice, who held you hand and walked with you never asking you where or why…just walked with you all the way.

For people, unlike things don’t have replacements. Don’t loose them or someday you might, or rather we all would start feeling like a small fish in the ocean…And then it may be too late to clean up the mess in the closet and start the re-building phase. Each person is entitled to their opinions and interests. Disagreements shouldn’t breach the bonds, but rather in mutual self-acceptance you take the bonds further. No one is perfect and no can be expected to be so.

Relationships..their true value is ideally learnt only when it is actually lost but then it would be too late. Keep the bonds strong in 
spite of all the disagreements, misunderstandings and honest conflicts, especially with those who have stuck with through the downhills and stayed on with you through the up-heavals of life. Don’t throw away the bonds, for no one ever knows whether tomorrow will come,  and that your tomorrow would be seen thanks to the person of today, who was indeed a lifesaver in the worst of situations. Keep the spirit of relationships alive, no matter how near or far you might be. Count your blessings as they come, for they’ll help you see the days of the future.

 

 

 

 


By thine own way o’ life…

Sometimes, as the days go by and we all get caught by in the “happenings” and the “busy”-ness of life, that before we know it, it’s all over and it’s time up. Frankly speaking, working in the hospital is kind of a dual deal – I get to experience the miracle of “life” with all the expectant mothers and howling new-borns and the “bleakness” of life as well – the denial and the acknowledgements tht it’s time to say “goodbye”.  Those who get involved in accidents are the worst, and so are the victims of drunk driving.

Dealing with death is not easy at all, neither for those who have to declare the death or the fact that death is at the corner, nor for those who have to hear. It’s so fast and easy for life to get snuffed out. Which is why, some of the things that I have kept for long in the dark have to be done.

Some of what I’ll personally christen as “my rules of living life my way”…

Primarily, to make peace with my past, so that I can firmly say a goodbye to it and bury it, for it should never screw up my present.

What other people think of me is none of my business. They can carry their personal thoughts and “commentary” about me, to wherever they want to. There is absolutely no point in wasting my peace o’mind and time concerning them. My business involves primarily in thinking of my rpinciples and preserving my self-worth.

Time heals almost everything,I’ll give time the chance to do so. Someday the hurt of broken relationship will no longer be like a sore joint. And time, will give me another try someday.

No one is incharge of my happiness, except me, myself. I can always view at problems in two ways – let my emotional response get over my head or instead, give in to the emotional rant if required and then think rationally and deal with the crisis.

I won’t  compare my life to others n not will I  judge them. Besides, I have no idea about what their journey is all about. I know, no one will know about mine except myself!!! I have my set of dreams, I’ll go about doing them, instaed of making comparisons. For the sooner I start on my dreams, the more I can get done !!!

And what my Granma used to say always; stop thinking too much, it’s alright not to know all the answers, they will come to you when you least expect it. Rather sleep on it, it’ll all work out, eventually. After all worrying is like being in a rocking chair, you will end up in the same stage you started off in; getting nowhere !!!

And most importantly, to smile and laugh and to sing aloud, even in my bathroom voice. I don’t own all the problems in this world, nor do I want to put them on my shoulders. I’ll just deal with mine for now. The rest o’ the problems will be taken care of in the ude course of time.

That’s the end of my seven realisations of life for know. This bings to mind, something that one of my friends once said, “life is d hardest school as no one ever knows what level of class one will be in, what exam will be next and you can’t even try to copy b’coz no one else will have the same question paper.”

Instead, at your own pace you’ll have to tackle one day at a time. Eventually all the answers will come, and then goodbye won’t be dreary as expected !!! And the destination at the end of the road, will be near to where you wanted to reach !!!

 


At the end of the day…

Sometimes, certain days get highly tedious and stressful. Deadlines have not been met. Schedules have to be made. Meetings to be held and re-scheduled, notes to complete and reports to go over.

Worse still, you get back after work, and there is always more to do. For some, it’s dinner, homework with the kids and loads of housework. For other’s it’s an ailing parent who needs all the attention they can get, but work is needed to bring bread to the table. For others, it could be an empty apartemnt with loads of dished and laundry piled up.

Meals missed. Sleepless nights. Stressed out nerves. Harried personal time or almost nil. In the middle of all the furore, you pause and try to breathe. And mentally, you end up cursing yourself,wondering what have I achieved today ? Why does each day, end up in this harried pace ? Each of us have a different meaning on to how to spend our day. For some, priorities just the main ones, for others maybe all. When it all gets out of my hand, and I reach near the breaking point; I remember something that was told to me by one of my colleagues.

If you planted hope in any hopeless heart,  

If someone’s burden was lightened because you did your part,

If you caused the laugh that chased some of the tears away,

If tonight your name is remembered when someone kneels down to pray,

Then the deadlines don’t matter any more,

For your day has already been well spent…